Always tweaking something!

Day 2012

Lazy Day Cop Out

This is a “Random Dozen”. I should link it, but I’m doing a drive by posting and haven’t mastered the art of embedding links in a drive by (yet)

1. Have you ever fired a gun or shot a bow and arrow?

Yes to both and I’ve eaten what ever it was my projectile went through. Unless it was just an inanimate target. I think the gun target shooting has contributed to this damnable tinnitus I have . . .

2. Do you know where your childhood best friends are?

I’ve been a bit of a loner, but yes, I do know where my high school best friend is. We’ll be bowling Thursday night actually . . .

3. Do you usually arrive early, late, or on time?

I try to arrive no more than 5 minutes early for official type stuff. For family gatherings the rules are a little less stringent. I don’t want to arrive ridiculously early because my own time is valuable too, and I try to squeak out every minute I can . . .

4. Are you more of a New York or California type?

I’m laid back for a New Yorker, but wound waaaayyyy too tight for the California style. Living IN New York in no way influenced my attitude.

5. Do you have a special ring tone?

Oh yeah, my phone buzzes in my pocket in that ‘special’ way whenever a gal calls

6. What is your favorite type of chip?


7. Best comedy you’ve ever seen is ….

Love Big Bang Theory. I think I’m more a Leonard than a Sheldon.

8. Have you ever cut your own hair? To quote Dr. Phil, "How’d that work for ya?"

I will trim a stray every now & then, but for the most part, all I could do is a buzz cut. My head is way too large for that look.

9. If you were going to have an extreme makeover, would you rather it be about your house or your personal self?

A new master bath would be nice . . .

10. Are you allergic to anything?

Old Spice, Safe Guard, a couple other fragrances used in deodorants. When my shirt feels like it’s abrading it’s way through my armpits? It’s the deodorant. Old Spice does it the quickest, others take a week or so. Safe Guard just makes me break out in a rash aaaaaalllll over the place. Luckily it subsides quickly too.

11. Why is it so hard to change?

The phone booths are so damn small. Harder to find now too what with all the cell phones around . . .

Seriously – it’s hard to convince yourself that you need to get out of what you’ve become comfortable with. Or that you’re the one that’s wrong and now you have to conform to a new ideal.

12. One last question dedicated to February love: CS Lewis said, "To love is to be vulnerable." Please share one example of that assertion or share any thought you’d like to about this topic.

That topic has come up quite a bit lately. Part of love is trust. Part of trust is knowing that when you do make yourself vulnerable, your partner has your back, your front and your feelings covered for you. If you think for even a minute that your partner can’t do that for you, you have insufficient trust and it is difficult to cultivate any type of lasting love.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Some stuff came up in the 1 on 1 part of counseling last night. I brought up an item or two, Janine echoed my sentiments and it has HER worried. I have more to say, more that I want to capture here, but I need to process it. For the first time Janine is saying that “this might be as far as it goes – accept conditions for what they are and deal with it, or . . . .?


4 responses

  1. I kinda did a Random 12 drive-by as well. It was fun!

    It sounds like you are getting closer to where I was just a few months ago with the the “this might be as far as it goes – accept conditions for what they are and deal with it, or . . . .?” I hope you are able to come up with an “or” that you can live with!

    February 24, 2010 at 3:02 pm

    • bikinfool

      Doing lots of thinking. Hard to bail on 30+ years. Hard to compromise any more too.

      February 26, 2010 at 12:52 am

  2. I wish you luck, my friend.

    February 24, 2010 at 3:34 pm

    • bikinfool

      I could use some of your self assessment abilities Rox. I really need to understand my motivations.

      February 26, 2010 at 12:56 am

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