Always tweaking something!

What – again?

Day 1991

So Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow yesterday and now we’re blessed with 6 more weeks of winter. Seeing as I’m a couple 3 hundred miles north of Phil, 6 weeks seems like a good deal. But I have to wonder, what with all the cameras & lights & attention, how could he NOT see his shadow? I also thought groundhogs (or woodchucks as we call ‘em around here) hibernated through the winter. Wtf is he doing out & about in the middle of winter, waking up to take a pee break?

Had a another counseling session yesterday, but this one was a little different. Normally, after our counseling session, I have about an hour to get a bite to eat and head to me Al Anon meeting in the neighboring town. But last night, I had an Al Anon district type meeting on the opposite side of the city that was to start at the same time our session normally ends (with my 1/1 session with Janine). Wasn’t going to work. So this time we made arrangements to switch places. I got to start, couples was in the middle and Cindy wrapped things up.

It was interesting seeing the change in dynamic shuffling the status quo of the session caused. Personally, I liked it. I have found it difficult to come into the room for the couples portion after Cindy & Janine have been in there talking for 40 minutes or so. They’ve set the mood & tempo of the room, I have NO idea what they’re yammering on about, and I get to come in, sit down and try to make myself comfortable. It’s become a game for me to try and guess the subject of the day. I can brag and say I get it right better than half the time with no input from the XX chromosome units. (How’s that one saying go – it ain’t bragging if you can do it?)

Aaaaaannnyhow. I would compare the feeling I have walking into that room to being the visiting team at a sporting event. You KNOW you’re walking into someone else’s house and they have the advantage. Last night was different and Cindy was feeling it. Plus, she got into the ½ hour room late. She stayed out in the waiting area until Janine went out and got her. When I get to come in second, Janine has told me time and again, just come on back & knock on the door when it’s time. Cindy has heard this, she’s been there countless times when I’ve done it, yet when it’s her turn? One gets the impression she’d rather have not been there.

Since she was late, we only had 15 minutes or so of couples time. It wasn’t very productive. I brought up one incident that happened Sunday evening that highlighted a few common themes that we seem to constantly run into.

The themes?
1 – Simple requests I make are unfulfilled or blatantly ignored. That one’s on Cindy.
2 – I missed an opportunity (again) to ‘stay in the moment’ and gently confront Cindy about #1. Instead, I did some counter productive passive aggressive thing. That one’s on me.
Sunday has been trash night for 15 years. I got it.

Had a bit of a reality check with Janine too. I wanted to make sure the two of them weren’t laying back waiting on ME to make some sort of breakthrough. The good news is that that apparently is NOT the case. Bad news is Janine is starting to ask me how long I’m willing to wait. Sheesh.

Cindy emailed me today asking when would be good for us to talk about some things. Interesting. Makes me wonder what she and Janine talked about. Cindy used a very nice set up in asking for our little talk. Too bad it got wasted. I told her I’d be willing to have that little chat tonight. Somehow, that little chat didn’t happen. Hmmm. Maybe she’s finding out how difficult it can be to launch into one of these things. Well – at least for me.

Did some bowling tonight. Kind of a funny night. 1st game, only had 3 strikes, but they were well placed. No opens, nothing less than a 9 really. Ended up with a 203. Lefty? Beat me by 20. Second game started rough – big split. Got lined up, recovered, closed with 6 strikes in a row for a 228. Lefty? Beat me by 1. Last game, started out hotter than a house afire. Strike, spare then 5 in a row. Faded some at the end but still had a 220. Lefty? Beat me by 7. I bowled my ass off, he bowled his average. He really is an incredible bowler. Had a fun night, bowled a fun team. Ended up splitting the points so no one went home mad or beat up. And really, everybody bowled good tonight. Games were close which adds to the entertainment.

Well – off to bed for me. One more day at the salt mine and it’s weekend time. Wish I had some concrete plans.


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