Always tweaking something!

Diving in again

I’m posting this for Betty.  It’s a meme she had on her site.  I’m only like 5 days late, but that the heck . . .

1. name:  Brian
2. birthday: 12/18/195x
3. place of residence: upstate NY (way closer to Canada than NYC)
4. what makes you happy: These days – watching my kids (heh, kids!) become real live adults.
5. what are you listening to now/have listened to last: Now – the hum of the building A/C  Last music I consciously heard loud: Metallica, “Enter Sandman”
6. an interesting fact about you: Back in my K-12 school days, I went undefeated in spelling bees.  Yes, that’s right, 3 wins, no losses.

7. are you in love/have a crush at the moment:  It’s complicated.  Basically trying to rebuild a marriage.
8. favorite place to be: Up in my treestand on a cool October morning.  Deer not required.
9. favorite lyric:

Ignore the beasts under your bed

In the closet,

In your head.
10. best time of the year: June or October.  Toss up.
11. strangest food you like:  Hot, really hot, really, really hot peppers.
12. biggest fear:  Failing at anything.
13. biggest ambition: growing up.  I’m a guy.  It’s hard.
1. a film: Midnight Express
2. a book: The whole Thomas Covenant series (8 and counting) by Stephen R. Donaldson
3. a band, a song and an album: Band – Rush, song – Molly Hatchett, “Dreams”, Album – Rush, “2112”
1. one thing you like about me: Only one?  OK – You keep trying to find the bright side of everything.
2. two things you like about yourself: 1 – Eternally optimistic.  2 – except for driving, I can be very patient
3. put this in your blog so i can tell you what i think of you.  Gimme a day or so to get it there

4. post a picture of you:  Check out my sons wedding pics.  Referenced in my blog thingy.  I’m the dude in the tux wearing glasses.  No – the older one.  With a ‘stache.

Now.  I must apologize.  No, not for my lack of updates – although that is a sorry thing in and of itself.  No, I need to apologize to New Orleans.  Way back in 2005 we were toying with the idea of visiting New Orleans.  Spent hours looking up details, had a hotel & flights picked and were >< this close to pulling the trigger.  Then Katrina happened.  WE felt lucky.  New Orleans?  Not so much I’m thinking.

Monday, we rekindled that interest.  Calling it our 28th anniversary present to each other.  Pulled the trigger, made the reservations.  For 6 days & 5 nights in the middle of August we will be tromping around the Quarter.  Hopefully without need of a boat, except for maybe a swamp tour and a riverboat ride.  Hoping that this time, our being decisive about the trip will avert that whole hurricane thing.

Yes, I’m aware that our not going had nothing to do with Katrina, Rita and that other hurricane that ripped through in 2005.  But the coincidence is mind numbing.

So.  If any of you have been to New Orleans and can make recommendations on where to go, what to do, eat and or see, I’d appreciate it.  What we have lined up so far is this:

Café Dumond for beignets

Central Grocery for a muffaletta

Garden tour

Cemetery tour

Riverboat trip (the Natchez maybe)

Swamp boat trip

Bubba Gump Shrimp Co. (Kids request – I don’t think it has much to do with New Orleans at all, it’s just a made up movie thing really)

Maybe Nola’s for lunch one day (Dinner for 2 there would set you back nearly a C note I think)

Love to get out to Avery island but it appears to be a tad far.  Maybe they have an outlet store in town?

We’re famous (NOT!)

Great way for your town to get recognition, no?

More pond updates.  I think we had up to 3 separate hatches of little fishies.  At least, I’ve seen fry that are 3 different sizes.  The smallest I found Saturday.  I have pictures, but it’s hard to put things to scale.  The littlest ones are maybe ¼ inch long.  I only saw them because I was reaching in to pick out a leaf or something and noticed some movement.  At first I only saw one or two, but the more I looked, the more I saw.  I have no idea how many of the teeny ones there are for sure, but I thin I saw over a dozen of the little buggers.  There’s a few that are in the ½ inch class and anther batch that’s up around ¾ of an inch.

This is one of the little 1/4 inch long guys

This is one of the little 1/4 inch long guys

The bigger fish.  The white/cream koi just above and right of center is maybe 8" long.

The bigger fish. The white/cream koi just above and right of center is maybe 8" long.

There are also 8 survivors from at years class of feeders.  They’re big enough now to go to the surface with their bigger buddies and feed on the pellets we toss in.  Then Sunday, while I was putzing around in the pond (again), I saw our surviving tadpoles.  2 of them.  Back legs coming along, no front legs to speak of and plenty of tail left.  How long does it take for these things to mature?

One of the two surviving tadpoles.  He's about 4" long.

One of the two surviving tadpoles. He's about 4" long.

According to the innernetz, if they really are bull frog tadpoles, they can be in the tadpole stage up to TWO YEARS!  That’s a long time to wait for frog legs.  I’m gong to have to do something else for lunch I guess.

I’m scribbling this down in the early afternoon.  At 5 we have another of our weekly couples therapy sessions.  I suspect today’s will be a lot like the one we had back on Memorial Day.  I had a 1 on 1 with the therapist last night, and we kinda sorta worked out a strategy for how to broach the subject of Cindy’s continued surreptitious drinking.   It seems that as long as I’m willing to ignore it, she’ll remain cheery and upbeat, thinking that she’s getting away with it.  But she’s still hiding both her drinking and her stash.  Even without seeing her drink, I KNOW she has been and what’s worse, she’s lying to the therapist about it.

So.  In I go again.  Something along the lines of “Your drinking has not gone unnoticed.  If you continue to drink, I fear that we will eventually end up right where we were two years ago.”  That’s where I’m starting, I don’t know for sure where it’ll go from there, but I know what I need to say.

The good part is that Cindy has a 1 on 1 session immediately after our couples session.  I don’t now that she’ll use much of it as she has a tendency to close off in the face of truthful feedback that is counter to what she wants to believe.  I’m calling bullshit, she’s not going to like it and will give me three days worth of the silent treatment.  Who knows what she’ll do about the New Orleans trip.  Probably change it to 1 person instead of two.

OK  – after session now.  I think I know less than when I went in.  Unfortunately, I had a meeting with the local Al Anon Information Service (AIS) office.  I do the newsletter (another time suck, I know) and we only meet once a month so I really had to go . . .  Downside is that I missed my regular Al Anon meeting.  Could have used it tonight.  No local Al Anon group meets locally on Wednesday and Thursday?  It’s a 15 mile drive to a group.  Aaahhhhh – but I get to see Annette tomorrow for lunch.  Might be a good place to be – more therapy.


5 responses

  1. Been to New Orleans a few times. I recommend eating your way through and asking locals where to go for food. They’re strange, but nice and do like to recommend. Also, do a haunted tour. I haven’t been on one, but they are supposed to be really cool with lots of weird history about the city. And if you want a little kink (which everyone does in NOLA) go see one of the live kink-shows on Bourbon street.

    And good luck going in August. If you’ve never been to that part of the south in the summer, be prepared for heat and humidity that will blow your mind.

    July 8, 2009 at 9:30 am

    • bikinfool

      Thanks for the tips Z. Being from the frozen tundra, my idea of hot & humid is about 80 degrees and 60%RH. I’m sure New Orleans in August is going to be a lot like hanging out in an armpit. Or worse. Wonder if they do the haunted tours at night? Or a haunted cemetery tour at night?

      Our hotel is on Bourbon St. and from what I hear, a kink show can’t be too far away. Now, if only the missus would like t go check one out . . .

      July 8, 2009 at 6:10 pm

  2. Q

    Uh, yeah, it’s gonna be WAY hotter than you’re prepared for down here lol. And that’s even further south & closer to the coast than where I live. That means more humidity…sheesh! I hope you have a good time there, though. You sure you’re not pouring toxic radiation into that pond of yours?

    July 8, 2009 at 8:13 pm

  3. good luck with the couple’s therapy. my friend’s parents tried it with great success – celebrating thirty years soon I think.
    I’ve never been to New Orleans but want to desperately. let us know how it goes!

    July 11, 2009 at 11:09 am

    • bikinfool

      Thanks Betty! We’re getting scary close to 30 years ourselves – 28 next month. Amazing where the time goes.

      July 17, 2009 at 8:03 pm

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