Multi-front Progress
Day 2781
The contractors are taking advantage of our unusually warm & early spring. Having started March 28, the house roofing is done except for what they’ll be walking on to put on the new siding. About 1/3 of the siding has been torn off and all the old exterior light fixtures are down. They’re adding a layer of R-4 insulation to the exterior sides and today (I think) they are making the mods I requested to combat the wicked ice dams (I did a little Freudian slip and added the ‘n’ to that dam(n)s) we get in a typical winter.
Those changes? Pull the insulation out of the eaves and off the exterior sloped portion of the ceilings. Put in new rigid foam insulation over the interior portions of the house, add a shitload of vents to the underside of the eaves (soffits) and make sure that cold air can flow against the underside of the roof deck. The insulation is to keep the house warm, not the roof deck. When it’s 0o out, that’s a losing battle.
If a picture is worth a thousand words, what’s a picture of handwriting worth? Here’s my sketch of the damn dam problem:
My depiction of the damn ice dam problem
And now, progress pics:
Back of the house, day 3.
All the roof visible here is new. The back porch isn’t changing much except to paint the skirting a new color. The garage hasn’t been stripped quite yet so you can see the original color.
Our new color scheme - Mid 50's retro!!
Yeah. The 1950′s Pepto pink is an additional layer of R-4 insulation. Don’t look into the garage. Most of the mess is from the contractors. Really.
View looking east, with the forsythia bush in the foreground.
Another view of the front, catching glowing forsythia. That sucker is 6 feet tall, only because I hack a foot of growth off it every summer. Also makes for a boat load of blooms the following spring. For the record, it’s blooming at least 2 weeks early.
My annual close up of the Forsythia bush next to the garage.
Yes, my obligatory annual close up of the forsythia. The blooms are only this nice for maybe a week, then it rains yellow petals.
On other fronts, I am gaining some independence here at the new job. I’m catching things, noticing subtleties’ and asking fewer questions just to do the daily grind. That’s good. Also actually put in my time for last month, had billable hours, put in a travel expense report that will reimburse me over $600 for mileage on my truck, Thruway tolls (I-90 in NY & Massachusetts is all toll – $13 from just east of Rochester to just west of Boston) and per diems for meals. About $400 of that is pure profit.
On the other other front, something Cindy done did Sunday just pissed me off royally. It’s a microcosm of what I see as shit that needs to get fixed in our relationship. And this one doesn’t even involve booze. Haven’t sat her down and had a talk about it yet because I was still pissed and I needed time to process it. Needed to make sure my perceptions were correct. Has more to do with her not letting go AND the existence of double standards. Bottom line – she thinks she is the boss of me and she bitches at me about the same damn things of which she is guilty. If I point this out to her I get 3 days of golden silence while she pouts. Kind of a double edged sword I’ve learned to enjoy.
Anyhow. If she’s sober-ish tonight, I’ll sit her down and we’ll discuss it. That’ll probably lead to 3 more days of golden silence, so maybe I’ll sneak in some golf.
//
Squeaker
Day 2770
Wow. My Syracuse boys narrowly averted disaster again last night. But that’s what they do – just enough to win. Those Wisconsin kids shot the lights out! 14 three-pointers in one game – are you kidding? Next up is Ohio St. I think. Good thing the Syracuse crowd travels well, they’re gonna need all the help they can muster for that one. For the record it’s about a 5 hour drive from Syracuse to downtown Boston. (If I’m driving. If you’re driving? Probably about 6 hours)
After yesterdays whiny little rant, I went and bowled terrible. I blame triple atomic chicken wings. Well, ok, not really. They had no effect. I missed a shot or two early, made an adjustment based on that then spent the rest of the night trying to convince myself that the move was right. Last half of the last game I moved back to my original line and promptly pronounced myself an idiot. Done it before, will do it again. At least I don’t have to throw a bowling ball again till golf season is over.
Oh, and after bowling, what did I come home to? S.O.S. She’d gotten an update from the contractor that’s going to do our roof & siding and tried to tell me the same thing 3 times. I don’t know if she couldn’t remember that she just told me, didn’t hear my comments acknowledging her statements, didn’t hear my questions for clarification (which she answered) or what – but after she told me the third time I had to rather firmly tell her that I’d gotten it all and she was just repeating herself – again.
That, more than anything, is what drives me to working on those math problems in my head. Can’t have a conversation because she’s drunk & kinda slurring her speech. She’s too drunk to connect thoughts remember what was said and process the information. She’ll complain that we never go out with other couples, but everytime I ask her out with friends, she “needs to stay home to do her sub calls”. (i.e. stay home, get drunk and obsessively check her work voicemail) Not every night, but 3 of 4 so far this week. Not falling down drunk (like a few years ago), but drunk enough that it’s painfully obvious to me and I psychologically disconnect. Hence the math games – what would my budget be? Can I swing the house alone? Would I have to find a roomie? Do I just let her buy me out & leave? Sell it and split the equity? (Even though the mortgage payments always came out of my paycheck)
I know what my two best options are, and both of them involve me getting a new address. They both kinda piss me off, so I’m not fed up enough to actually do anything. Yet. But if there is a next time – I will get legally separated before wading into the dating pool. It’s just a mess doing it in the opposite order. Although it worked out well for the guy across the street. Maybe I need to go chat him up this weekend, hmm?
Cautious & Busy
Day 2641
Holy Crap! Still alive, busy at work, putting the finishing touches on the bathroom project (finally!)
This contract work where I am is not too bad. The work is good, the people are good, the company is solid. Love to get picked up full time at the end of my contract. Hate to go through the job search cycle again.
To be sure, I am still looking. Haven’t heard back on that in-person interview for the field engineer spot. That outfits website still lists the position as open, so maybe? We’re pushing 2 weeks now though, and I got the impression a decision was going to be quicker. Maybe I’m #2 and they’re waiting for #1′s negotiations & background checks to clear before they close everything out. If that’s the case, I hate being #2. In any sense.
I desperately need to get back to Al Anon too. It would be primarily for my own good, but it might be the kick in the pants Cindy needs to realize that she’s heading down the same path she was on several years ago. She tries to blame me for being closed off & uncommunicative without realizing that her lack of sobriety is the catalyst. Denial is strong in that one.
If you would like to kick my butt in “Words with Friends”, shoot me your player name or Zynga number and I’ll look you up for a game. My kids are kicking my butt right now.
Better run, reports don’t write themselves ya know . . .
You Wouldn’t Think I was Terminal
Day 2466
Wish something would shake loose in the job search. Put out 15 resume in the last 3 days and haven’t heard word one from any of the respective HR departments. I plan on doing 5 a day from here on out. Might have to get all CSI on them and track down phone numbers to call too. I understand that the HR departments are busy, but the lack of feedback is unsettling.
My chief complaint is really that my soon to be non-job has me so busy that I have no time to conduct any real job search business during the day. If I was so freakin unnecessary, how do I get to be so busy?
Cindy got herself all self medicated Sunday afternoon/evening. Yesterday she was sulky all day because I really, really cut back on how I interact with her when she’s been drinking. I’ve told this to her face (when she’s sober), I behave consistently when it happens, so she KNOWS that if she drinks I withdraw.
Nevertheless, she drinks, I withdraw, next day she’s all pouty like I did something wrong and she’s punishing me.
There’s a topic for discussion – without a therapist in the room. Hmmm, what am I doing tonight (besides finishing this report I really need to get back to . . .)
TGIFriday
Day 2413
I am frazzled. I have more going on in my head, but this is what’s at the surface today:
Eric & Kel are here for the weekend and we have all the kiddos coming over for diner tonight. Can’t decide if I should make Jambalaya or Chicken Chipotle Chowder. Cindy is a greeter at her Friday evening AA meetings (for the month I think) so she’ll be tied up there till 9pm-ish.
Also have a little flap to smooth over about wedding invites, number of people being invited and where to draw the line. It all stems from poor communication, compounded by some poor judgment made by a certain individual after a cocktail or three. Trying to convince her that Facebook is NOT the place to address the extended family and inform the they’re not being invited because the kids are having a small wedding. At least THAT happy message was only posted for an hour before we convinced her to pull it down.
This weekend we’ll have all the players in one room and we can try to unruffle some feathers. I intend to open up the subject then pull back and let the two sides hash it out. I am DONE being the mediator.
Jambalaya or Chicken Chipotle Chowder? Decisions, decisions . . .
Gotta Change That Top Post
Day 2347
So I’m going to toss up some drivel to push that little writing project down a notch.
Bowling Thursday was SCH a chore! IT was another one of those nights where the oil pattern seemed a tad long. Consequently I had a tough time getting the ball to the pocket with any kind of hitting power. Across the first two games I think I had maybe 6 or 8 strikes (a paucity, I assure you) and everything else was a 9, except for an opening split in the first game. So lessee – that’d be one split, call it 7 strikes and 14 breaks for 9. That ain’t gonna get it done.
Third game I broke out of my 9 funk by switching lines (trying a new path to the pocket). This worked so well I managed to get only 7 on the first ball 5 times. Stayed good with the spares, but what a struggle the evening was.
Changing lines that last game was good though, because I finally managed to get the speed adjustment down too. In spite of the lousy hits early on, things did improve towards the end of the game.
Aaaannnnnyhow. Back to planning the re-do of our master bath. Previously, we had two medium sized walk in closets and no master bath. We borrowed 3 feet from the bedroom added it to the closet space and managed to squeeze in a closet and a 3/4 bath. At the time, it served it’s purpose well because we had both boys at home, the in-laws every summer and the two of us, all trying to get ready for our days in a single bathroom upstairs. Not good.
So? Since it’s just the two of us now, we’re going to annex the 4th bedroom onto our existing 3/4 bath & closet combo and put in a full sized bath (tub AND shower!!) and a decent sized walk in closet. Because it’s still winter up here and it was -6 again yesterday, work won’t be tarting till at least March or April because I have a few windows to re-arrange and or replace. In case you weren’t sure, having huge, gaping holes in the side of your house for even a few hours when it’s in the teens outside is NOT conducive staying warm. So we’ll wait for window replacing weather.
I’m also working on a Reader’s Digest version of the back story to Saturdays little letter to nowhere. One or two commenters (and thanks to all of you for chiming in – it’s greatly appreciated!) mentioned a desire to know the back story. It’s coming.
Also? Work is seriously kicking my butt. And? I officially hate Microsoft Project.
That is all.
It’s Complicated
Day something or another
In response to a recent request: From a man’s perspective, what did I think of the movie?
First, if you can catch it at a matinee or a discount theater, by all means go see it. Might not be worth first run, prime time dollars to watch.
Second, the premise, is conceivable, probably something similar has even happened in real life. Because of events in my own life, parts of this movie touched close to home. Didn’t grate on any raw nerves, but found the tender spots.
When I grow up, I want to be a divorcee in California planning a $200K renovation to my $1M+ home that paid for with my divorce proceedings and my income from a boutique bakery, while my progeny is attending Ivy League schools on the East Coast. (Was that Columbia or Fordham? – may not have been Ivy)
Not a bad film, definitely had some laugh out loud funny moments, had it’s share of touching moments, Streep was very good, Baldwin handled the comedy elements well, the story flowed along well.
Not a bad movie for a date, decent couples flick. I wonder if seeing this gets me a pass to “Avatar” or “Book of Eli” in the future?
